Looking at Decision-Making Through Three Layers of the Brain
Sometimes we say, "I've made a decision..." But if we're honest with ourselves, most of the time it's not a decision; it's an impulse that's speaking.
Impulse is the language of "right now." It's a fleeting attraction, a sudden aversion, or an irresistible urge for "relief"... And often, without us realizing it, the body and mind's autopilot kicks in.
My fundamental premise here is: There is no decision within the impulse. Decision begins where we can stop, despite the impulse.
Because when we can stop, we not only hear "desire," but also "need." We don't just consider "now," but also "later."
Impulsive Flow Isn't Always a Problem
We can allow some of our behaviors to flow impulsively. This is a natural rhythm of life. Sometimes spontaneity brings vitality and puts us in the flow.
However, the problem starts at this point: When we struggle, when we pay a price, and in repeating cycles... There is no longer "flow," but "repetition." There is no feeling of "I am living," but a feeling of "I am being lived." It is precisely at this point that understanding how the system works is the first step to liberation.
Neurological Origins of Human Attitudes: 3 Different Levels of Operation
The attitudes and behaviors in our brain operate through billions of complex connections. However, to make it easier to understand ourselves, we can create a simplified map based on the "dominant region" where an attitude is triggered and managed.
Here are those three different voices within us:
1. Impulsive (Automatic) Attitude: "Fast Reward Mode"
(Primitive Brain / Reptilian Brain / Pleasure Principle)
This is the oldest and most deeply rooted part of the system. It operates mainly in the brainstem and basal ganglia. Its primary fuel is dopamine.
- How it Works? It engages in "reward hunting." Its primary drive is for immediate relief, pleasure, or escape from pain.
- Internal Experience: "I want!", "I can't stand it!", "I want it now!" or "I must escape from here immediately."
- Feelings: Intense cravings, restlessness, boredom, brief flashes of anger, and "explosive" reactions against restriction.
- Summary: The impulsive mind "exaggerates the 'now'";
time shrinks, and options disappear.
2. Emotional (Romantic–Fantastic) Attitude: "Story and Connection Mode"
(Limbic System / Mammalian Brain / Value and Belief Principle) This is the center of relationships, connection, and meaning. It operates with the accompaniment of oxytocin (trust/connection) and endorphins
- How it Works? It not only feels, but also writes a scenario for what it feels. It idealizes, romanticizes, or sometimes dramatizes.
- Internal Experience: "Let me be loved," "I want to be safe," "This is unfair," "I am alone."
- Feelings: Love, compassion, the desire for trust; or, conversely, resentment, loneliness, and emotional anger stemming from the pursuit of justice.
- Summary: The emotional mind "creates a 'story'";
it sees events through the lens of relationships and meaning.
3. Thoughtful (Intellectual/Cognitive) Attitude: "Reality and Regulation Mode"
(Neocortex / Human Brain / Logic Principle) This is our "reasoning" side. The prefrontal cortex is particularly active. With the balancing effect of serotonin
- , it manages other chemicals for attention and focus. How it Works? It stops, analyzes, sees options, and sets priorities. Its goal is not to be right, but to
- manage reality. Internal Experience:
- "What is happening now?", "What are my options?", "What is the long-term cost of this?", "Which of my needs is most important?" Feelings:
- Curiosity, admiration, a calm clarity, a healthy skepticism (reality check), and the ability to look at events from a distance. Summary: The intellectual mind "sees the 'whole picture'."
It doesn't suppress impulse, nor does it minimize emotion; it treats them as "data" and produces the best decision.
There is No "Right–Wrong" Decision, There is "Suitability" In the complexities of life, forcing decisions into a rigid dichotomy of "right" and "wrong" often fails to reflect reality. This is because every decision contains an economic truth:
Trade-off. When you choose one path, you give up some of the gains from the other path. This trade-off (opportunity cost) does not mean you made the wrong decision. It simply shows that you have clarified which need you prioritized at that moment.
Therefore, it is better to characterize decisions as follows:
- Good Decision: One that is appropriate for the need.
- Better Decision: A holistic decision made with awareness of instinct, emotion, and reason.
Judging Leads to Division, Evaluation Leads to Growth
We make decisions based on our current level of existence (fatigue, stress, capacity). Therefore, it is unfair to put past impulsive actions or emotional attitudes on trial in an "intellectual court."
People divide themselves when they judge. They grow when they evaluate. True growth comes from, after making a choice, turning back and asking with compassion:
"How did this choice serve me and my needs? What did it nourish, what did it weaken? What can I do 'better' next time?"
What we need in the long run is not to make perfect decisions, but to
integrate. Without excluding the instinct within, without belittling the emotion, without idolizing the reason... The moment I can bring them all together at one table, that decision truly becomes my decision. TipXAtlas Practice: 2-Minute Pause Break
When you are in the middle of a challenging situation or making a decision, follow these steps:
STOP:
- Stop the action. Take a deep breath. NOTICE:
- Who is in the driver's seat right now? Instinct? (I want it to be quick, I want to escape)
- Emotion? (Am I writing a story, am I looking for connection?)
- Reason? (Do I see the whole picture?)
- NAME THE NEED:
- What do I actually need? (To relax, to be understood, to find a solution?) CHOOSE and EVALUATE:
- Choose the one that best meets your need, accepting the cost. Reminder:
Instinct wants speed, emotion wants connection, reason wants wholeness.
Dr. Abdurrahman Subaş
Education and Management Scientist